Travis Salazar

I’ve decided I have 3 things to say…

1) When I was young I wanted to grow up. I wanted to be able to drive, stay up late, drink, and to simply be free. Why is it that now I don’t want to drive? Driving sucks! You get stuck in traffic and then you get all pissed at everyone around until you just wish Flanders is dead… Staying up late is something I still do, but going to school the next day after 5 hours of sleep really sucks, especially if this is a regular thing. I don’t want to stay up late, but I do because I can’t sleep… Ah yes, drinking. As a child you wonder what it would be like to drink the hooch. Then when you get older you get drunk and you say never again. Then you say that again the 2nd and the 3rd and the 4th, etc. until you wish Flanders is dead… Then there is this whole freedom thing. Let me clarify there are 2 kinds of freedom that I could discuss here: freedom from parents or freedom from yourself. I’m going with the latter. Remember the good ‘ol days when you could run around the house naked? Or you could walk around with a plastic sword and helmet and never really get questioned by people as you showed up to their house? Why can’t we go back to that? No judgment, no criticism… I guess you only get to experience this when you become a crazy old person…

2) Why cake? Can’t it be a birthday stew, steak, pie, or punch in the face? Why did we settle on cake? Don’t get me wrong I love cake, but who decided that it must be cake? Is this something we can blame the French for? I’m sure if we did blame them that they would attempt to defend themselves somehow with an “anti-French taunting line” but then we would just go through Belgium and take them over and form a government to rule over them. Or could we blame the American’s and Capitalism? Cake is cheap to make and some of the basic ingredient (eggs and flour) are produced in the country. Now if the population of the US is 295,734,134 that means that 295,734,134 (give or take a few, because lets face it some people are lonely) have a birthday a year. Lets say the standard cake takes 3 eggs and 2 cups of flour… that is 887,202,402 eggs and 591,468,268 cups of flour… Now, lets assume an egg costs 30 cents and a cup of flour costs 20 cents… that’s $1.30 a cake… That means that $384,454,374.20 (just on the eggs and flour for cake) is spent on birthdays in the US… So if you want to stick it to the US economy (and you live in the US) just have Birthday Water … or Birthday Dirt.

3) Gifts. Don’t worry I’m not going to start using math in this one. Gifts use to be awesome… I remember my 10th birthday so well, because I got Mario 3 for NES, I loved that game… I even got a Mario Balloon! I knew it was only going to get worse when I got new sheets and a comforter one year… then a few years after that my family (not my parents or brothers) forgot my birthday. Granted, my birthday does fall on Mother’s Day every 4/5 years (like I said not doing math) but this should be an easy thing for them to remember. Mother’s day = Travis’ Birthday. You see, every family occasion that happens during the week we normally just celebrate on Sunday. If your birthday is on Friday, the family will get together, as a whole, and do the family thing on the Sunday. You’d think that if my Birthday were on a Sunday, as well as on Mother’s day that they would remember, but no. I’m not bitter or anything, I didn’t even really care at the time. That’s the kind of guy I am. But back tp gifts. Yes they are great and I’d love to get them, but why does it have to be on this one day? Can’t people express their love/friendship for a person whenever the hell they feel like it? It is like they are being forced to be nice to you. I’d rather just chill and hang out with my friends (a lot like what I did last night) than have them throw gifts at me.

For those of that actually read all of this thanks for sticking in there
Okay, I’m done talking about all of this.
Keep on truckin’

This entry was posted on Wednesday, May 11th, 2005 at 5:32 pm and is filed under Ramblin'. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.